


I Probably Should Know Your Name

by aunt_zelda



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Crushes, Disabled Character, F/F, First Kiss, Flirting, Friendship, Holding Hands, M/M, Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-26
Updated: 2019-12-26
Packaged: 2021-02-26 06:02:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,425
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21978535
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aunt_zelda/pseuds/aunt_zelda
Summary: Jester wants to know the name of the Muscle Goddess in the school gym.Caleb wants to ask out the hot TA.
Relationships: Essek Thelyss/Caleb Widogast, Jester Lavorre/Yasha
Comments: 7
Kudos: 203
Collections: Critmas Exchange 2019





	I Probably Should Know Your Name

**Author's Note:**

  * For [tusktooth](https://archiveofourown.org/users/tusktooth/gifts).



> Hope you enjoy this fic! I wrote two of the pairings you requested, I hope that was ok.
> 
> Thanks to my beta, who will be named after author reveals.

Jester has seen her several times at the gym. Jester goes early because she’s always been an early riser, and Caleb stays up until 3am and then sleeps through the morning when he’s able. The gym is relatively empty most mornings, the rest of the students taking more after Caleb than Jester. 

But not … _her_. 

Jester doesn’t know her name, not yet. She’s working up the courage to ask. Right now she thinks of the woman as Muscle Goddess. 

Muscle Goddess is at least six feet tall, maybe taller. She’s got long silvery gray hair that’s braided with beads at intervals. And she can lift. Oh lord, she can lift. 

Jester has been building up her own strength gradually throughout the semester. With Muscle Goddess around, she starts to push herself longer and harder to spend more time in the gym in the mornings. She’s sore, but her arms are bulking up nicely and she can lift Caleb up in a bear hug now. 

The one thing Jester isn’t sure of is how to approach Muscle Goddess, but she knows she’ll figure that out soon enough. 

~*~

“I’m in _agony_!” Jester wails, faceplanting onto her bed. 

“And why is that?” Caleb asks. He’s humoring her. He’s learned by now that ignoring Jester only makes her louder. 

“Muscle Goddess!” Jester rolls over and looks piteously at him. “I worked out for a whole TWO hours this morning and I still couldn’t ask her what her name was!” 

“You should ask next time,” Caleb says. He’s advised this several times already. 

“Easy for you to say,” Jester scowls. “You’re a boy, it’s easier for boys.”

“… is it?” Caleb blinks. Not much has come easily to him in life. 

“Yes! You can just go up to a girl and say ‘hi, I’m Caleb, I’m super smart and I’m really handsome when I remember to take showers. I want to bone you.”

“‘Bone?!’” Caleb splutters. “I would not say that!”

“You could though!” Jester shoots a look at him. “Hey, any progress with that hot TA?”

Caleb slowly raises his textbook up, hiding his face. 

“I can still see your ears, Caleb! You’re blushing!” Jester throws a pillow across the room. “Talk to him! It’s not weird, you’re his age, aren’t you?” 

Caleb had come to college as a child prodigy, but dropped out due to mental health reasons. Now he’s completing his degree, but is frequently mistaken for a TA or a young professor by other students. Age-wise, he suspects he might even be a bit older than Essek the TA. Caleb hasn’t taken any classes where Essek has been a TA, so there’s no ethical concern either. 

“Thereabouts, yes,” Caleb says from behind his book. “That is not what is holding me back.” 

“Then what? Are you worried you’re too stinky? Because now that I remind you when to take showers, you’re not stinky anymore Caleb.” 

Caleb sighs and puts the book down. “Jester I ... I haven’t had much relationship experience. I don’t want to do something wrong.” Months ago he wouldn’t have opened up to Jester like this. But Jester, for all her exuberance, has proved herself a good friend to him. 

Jester bites her lip, eyes serious. “I’ll help you. I’ll think of something.”

“No, no, focus on your Muscle Goddess. Leave me to my work.” Caleb returns to his book and tries to ignore the expression on Jester’s face. It’s an expression he knows well, that of a classic Jester Plan forming. 

~*~

“Hey, you wanna spot me?”

Jester almost drops the weight in her hand. “What?” 

Muscle Goddess nods to the huge barbell above her. “Spot me?” 

One of the reedy guys lurking at the far end of the gym sidles over. “I could spot you?” he offers hopefully in a voice that grates on Jester’s ears. 

Muscle Goddess looks at him placidly. “No, you couldn’t. I’ve seen what you lift; you’re not strong enough.” 

The guy withers on the spot and slinks away. 

Jester bounds up to Muscle Goddess, smiling her friendliest smile. 

And that’s how she meets Yasha, and they become workout buddies. 

~*~

“Muscle Goddess has a NAME!” Jester announces, bursting into the dorm room. 

Caleb looks up from his geology textbook. “Yes, Jester, most people have at least one name. Sometimes even two or three.” He smiles at her. 

“Her name is _Yasha_!” Jester says dreamily, spinning around the cramped floor. “I’m going to marry her and we’re going to adopt five dogs and live by the beach near my mama.”

Caleb nods. “Please do not make me part of the wedding party.” He shudders at the idea of a loud room with people staring at him, expecting him to make a speech. 

“Okaaaaaaay … but only if you’ve got hot TA as your plus one!” Jester declares. 

Caleb shakes his head. “No deal, Lavorre.”

“I’m not going to get married for a while, you’ve got time. Oh!” Jester fumbles in her bag and tugs out a pamphlet. “There’s a special night at the Natural History Museum! It’s a singles event! You should go!”

Caleb accepts the pamphlet and flicks through it. He hasn’t been to the museum in a long time. There are new collections, and a promise of personal tours and no large tour groups bumbling around being noisy. It sounds perfect. 

“Who knows, Hot TA might be there.” Jester says. “And if not, there’s gonna be a ton of nerds who like the same stuff you do. Maybe you’ll find someone even HOTTER than Hot TA!” Jester gasps dramatically at the idea of such a person. 

“Maybe …” Caleb isn’t convinced of that, but it’s not a bad idea. He gets out his planner to mark down the date. 

Jester squeals with triumph when he does that. 

~*~

“What are you listening to?” Jester asks Yasha. 

Yasha almost always has headphones in when she works out, though she’s started to taken them out when Jester joins her. Jester does most of the talking, but Yasha is listening. 

“Viking metal.”

“Oh.” Jester continues her rotations for a bit. “… what’s that like?”

“Here, listen,” Yasha reaches over and tucks her headphones into Jester’s ears. 

Jester forgets to breathe. 

Loud, pounding drums and men screaming in a language she doesn’t recognize blast into her head. It’s kind of pretty, underneath all the intensity. 

“That’s Viking metal,” Yasha says, taking the headphones away. “I’ll play you some folk later, that might be more your speed. Or maybe power metal?” Yasha muses and continues to lift her weights. 

“Is that all you listen to, metal?” Jester asks. She’s more of a Top 100s girl, bubbly songs that make her want to dance all night. But she can imagine dancing with Yasha to the metal music, just a bit differently than she’s used to dancing. 

“Mostly, yeah.” Yasha grins. “You remind me of uh, those girls from the band Baby Metal?” she shrugs. “Y’know … all uh …”

Jester’s braces herself for something that’s about to crush her like a weight to the chest. 

“… cute.” Yasha says at last. Some color rises to her pale cheeks. 

Jester feels like she could lift the whole gym herself. 

~*~

“Cute! She called me cute!” Jester is bouncing on her bed. 

“I know Jester, you’ve said so at least fifty times now.” Caleb holds up two shirts in front of the mirror hanging from the closet door. He tends to wear a lot of brown and grey, neutral tones he never worries about having to match, but people have said blue brings out his eyes. Is that a good thing? “Jester, what do you think?” he turns to her.

“For the singles night at the museum?” Jester eyes his shirts critically. “No no no …” she pushes him aside and rustles around in the tiny wardrobe provided by the college. “This one! With … this scarf!” she flings a cream colored sweater at him and his purple scarf with the green polyhedral designs on the edges. 

“Are you only saying that because you got me that scarf for Winter’s Crest?” Caleb asks suspiciously, tugging the sweater on just the same. 

“Maaaaaybe?” Jester drapes the scarf around his neck. “You look good! That hot TA is gonna faint when he sees you!” 

Caleb puts on his usual brown jacket. “Jester, we don’t even know if he will be there.”

Jester oddly says nothing. She only smirks. 

“Jester …” Caleb eyes her suspiciously. 

“What? You’re going to be late, go, go!” Jester pushes him out of the door. 

Caleb gets his answer when he arrives at the museum and finds an enormous poster thanking Professor Leylas Kryn for curating the main exhibit. That was the professor that Essek was attached to at the college. If he was single, there was no chance he’d missed the notices for this event. Especially not if Jester slipped a pamphlet into his bag when he wasn’t looking, which, judging from her smirk earlier, Caleb suspects happened earlier this week. 

Caleb steels himself and enters the museum. It’s full of a gratifying number of students in various states of awkwardness. Caleb feels himself starting to relax, assured that he is hardly the most awkward of the lot. 

“Welcome! Feel free to wander, or take one of the suggested routes,” a woman in one of the student life t-shirts hands Caleb a map of the museum. 

Caleb meanders towards the gemstone exhibit. Sure enough, that’s where he finds Essek, leaning heavily on two forearm crutches. 

Unsure of how to begin, Caleb steps forward and reads the display case notes. It’s the centerpiece of Professor Kryn’s collection, a multi-sided stone carved from a single piece and faintly glowing.

Essek turns slightly and then stops, looking at Caleb more closely. “Hey,” he says slowly. “We’ve got Quantum Mechanics with Professor Errenis together, right?” 

Caleb nods. “Yes. I’m Caleb.”

“Caleb.” He smiles beautifully. “I’m Essek.” He sticks out his hand, wavering slightly as he regains balance. 

Caleb shakes his hand. “Yes, I know. You were my roommate’s TA. She got into a lot of arguments with you about her final paper.”

Essek chuckles. “I get into a lot of arguments with a lot of people, you’ll have to be more specific.”

“‘Emerging religions in the new age,’ is what she called it.” 

“Oh, Jester!” Essek smiles. “I was trying to shield her from Professor Kryn. She can get quite harsh when it comes to religious papers.” Essek frowns slightly. “… are you trying to set me up with her? Because I’m not interested in –”

“No, no, she’s not here. She’s seeing someone. I think.” Caleb frowns, unsure of whether Jester and Yasha the Muscle Goddess are dating quite yet. “But no. I’m here for myself.”

Essek brightens up considerably. “Really … and what sort of person are you looking for tonight?” 

Caleb smiles in what he hopes is a flirtatious manner. “Would you walk with me, while I figure that out?”

Essek smiles back. “Of course! You know I helped Professor Kryn curate this whole mess? Ask me anything, I probably know it.”

“You are going to regret making that offer,” Caleb says, following him to the next set of display cases. “I’ve been known to exhaust tour guides many times.” 

“I love a challenge.” Essek flashes a grin at Caleb. 

Caleb feels his heart skip a beat. He makes a mental note to buy Jester a box of fancy donuts the next chance he gets. 

~*~

“Yasha … I was wondering …” Jester says, trying to be casual and knowing she’s totally messing it up. 

Yasha waits patiently for her to finish her sentence. 

“Would you um … like to go get breakfast after this? With me?” Jester takes a deep breath and plunges forward. “… on a date?” 

Yasha locks her barbell into place. She sits in thought for what feels like a hundred years to Jester. 

“… yes.” 

Jester heaves a sigh of relief. “Oh! Wow! That’s great! That’s wonderful! I mean of course I wasn’t nervous or anything …”

“Jester, your hands are shaking.”

“… anyways, that’s great! You’re great!” Jester bounces on the balls of her feet. 

“Maybe we should uh, stop early today?” Yasha suggests. “I’m feeling hungry.” 

Jester eagerly agrees, and soon leads Yasha out of the gym and to a nearby café. 

“I’m getting pancakes, how about you?” Jester asks once they’ve settled at their table. 

“I don’t know,” Yasha admits. “I don’t really eat out much. Mostly I cook my own food, and I’m not a good cook.” 

Jester leans over and taps the menu. “Order this. It’s super cute and sweet.”

“Like you?” Yasha says. 

Jester blushes. “Well, I mean …”

Yasha grins at her and orders what Jester suggested. 

By the time their orders – two sets of pancakes with smiley faces made of chocolate chips and fruit – arrive, they’re holding hands. 

~*~

There’s a knock on Caleb’s door. He answers it, finding Essek standing in the hall outside. 

“Hello?” Caleb worries that he’s done something wrong, or forgotten an agreed upon time. 

“May I come in?” 

“Of course,” Caleb steps back, holding the door. 

Essek sits on the only clear chair in the room, resting his crutches against the side of Caleb’s desk. 

“How did you know where I live?” Caleb asks.

“Your roommate texted me.” Essek holds up his phone. Caleb scans through a string of emojis, including eggplants, donuts, and heart eyed faces, around Caleb’s dorm number, along with a message ‘I’m out alllllllll day btw he is so lonely!!!’

“Jester is many things, but she is not subtle.” Caleb knows he’s blushing. He’s horribly conscious of the stacks of books, his pajama pants at noon, and not knowing what to do with his hands. 

“Was she wrong?” Essek raises an eyebrow. 

“… no, she was not wrong.” Caleb sits down on his bed. “I do not want to mess this up.”

“That makes two of us.” Essek tilts his head. “May I kiss you?”

Caleb freezes in place. “Oh. I … yes. Please?”

Essek maneuvers himself onto the bed beside Caleb, using the edge of the desk for balance. He puts a hand on Caleb’s face, bringing them closer and closer together. Caleb sinks into the kiss with delight. 

Later, Jester looks down at a brief text from Caleb. _You are sexiled until tonight. Go have fun with Muscle Goddess. Thank you._

Jester puts her phone down and stares at Yasha, who’s leaning over to smell a flower and looks utterly peaceful. She’s definitely going to kiss Yasha by the roses later, or the dramatic fountain in the center of the botanical gardens, she’s not sure which yet.


End file.
